Today was Andrew's endo. appointment. He is still experiencing a beautiful honeymoon with his A1C at 5.0. Even though I'm so grateful for this wonderful news, I have to admit that I'm scared deep down.
I know that one day, the bottom will fall out and his pancreas will go kaput. I can feel the disappointment now even before it happens.
Diabetes not only takes a physical toll, but an emotional one as well. I think the emotional aspect can sometimes be worse. Diabetes makes ME feel like a failure sometimes if I don't dose Andrew correctly or when it decides to spontaneously take a different pattern out of the blue. I know that when the time comes for more insulin, I'll be beating myself up wondering what else I could have done.
One thing I know for sure and continue to remind myself is that God is BIGGER than diabetes! Diabetes can bring us down, but only God can bring us back out of that self pity pit.